Duuuuude....I'd love to hear your online dating stories. Everyone has one (or a dozen). Here's a glimpse into mine and a few of the things I've experienced. Comment below and tell me about yours!
I'm a single mother of two little boys. I've been separated for over 2 years and divorced for almost a year. I've been on Bumble, Tinder, The League and Coffee Meets Bagel. Not all at once, thank God. I would have been institutionalized. But over the course of the past two years.
I've met some great guys. I've also met some freak shows.
There was the guy who claimed to be a southern gentlemen mama's boy who was actually a sexist misogynist pig. Then there was the guy that was a decorated war hero who was really a child in a hot man's body. Then there were the DOZENS of guys who I "matched" with but never heard from. The hours of texts that lead to nothing. The guy who doesn't look at all like he did in his pictures (because his hot bod photos are 10 years old). The list goes on.
So what's the deal? Why is it so hard to meet "good people?" Why does everyone I talk to have a horror story to tell about online dating?
Because we are not AUTHENTIC online. When you have minutes or even hours or days to respond to a text, you can come up with something quirky or funny to say. Talk to your buddies about it, mull it over and finally move in with that catchy one liner. You're thinking, yeah, that guy's pretty funny, seems like he's got a great personality, we really jive...until you meet him in person and you want to stab your eyeballs out with your salad fork.
Hiding behind the guise of an app and filters on cameras is totally destroying how we put ourselves out the in the "marketplace" and how others perceive us. And it all leads to disappointment.
Yeah, yeah, I know. Not all online dating experiences are this disappointing. I know my fair share of people who have met online and have cultivated great relationships and marriages. Mazel to them. But there are SO. MANY. horror stories out there. And I firmly believe its because we don't know how to present ourselves authentically online.
The goal here my friends is to bring it back old school. Meet people in person. Weed them out quickly and with minimal effort; or feel the chemistry and dive deep. You'll know it when you first start talking to them, face to face. Don't be fooled by the cute things they say in a text. It's not REAL until you know someone.
So what are your stories? Have you been fooled before? God knows I have. Let's hear it!